


Trying to Get Bi

by breeeliss



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Bisexual!Adrien, Bisexual!Chat Noir, Bisexual!Ladybug, F/M, Hot or Not Games, Humor, Reveal, bisexual!marinette, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-05-12
Packaged: 2018-10-30 22:18:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10886052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breeeliss/pseuds/breeeliss
Summary: “Alright. How about Adrien Agreste?”Chat Noir sat up abruptly and stared at Ladybug over his shoulder. “Say what now?”"Let's hear it," Ladybug encouraged. "Hot or Not? He totally seems your type.”Chat Noir opened his mouth, closed it, and winced. “Eeehhhh, I dunno. T-That’s kind of a….a hard question.”Featuring: Bi!Ladybug and Bi!Chat Noir, a billboard of Adrien Agreste, a game of celebrity Hot or Not?, and a very awkward reveal.





	Trying to Get Bi

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LadySerendipitous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySerendipitous/gifts).



> this is a belated birthday gift for [ladyserendipitous](https://ladyserendipitous.tumblr.com/) who had the idea for this hilarious and horribly awkward tale. hope you like it friend!

“Okay, what about….ah, [Vanessa Paradis](http://iv1.lisimg.com/image/11641787/510full-vanessa-paradis.jpg).”

Ladybug took a bite of fudge. “Not,” she said with her mouthful. “Not that she’s not pretty, just not my type.”

Chat Noir hummed in agreement and plucked his own square of fudge from the Tom & Sabine’s box that was sitting in between them. “I might have to go Not too,” he decided. “Amazing model, probably go on a date with her, but that’s it.”

“Oh!” Ladybug perked up. “[Marion Cotillard](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/93/4b/94/934b9410d91d2afdde1e51770a2fd62c.jpg).”

Chat Noir snorted. “Um. Hot. Way hot. Not even a question. If she so much as even spoke to me, I’d probably self combust.”

“Same!” Ladybug laughed. “She has the most  _ beautiful _ eyes, I just want her to stare at me from across a candlelit dinner before she takes me home.”

“Takes you home to do  _ what? _ ” Chat Noir cackled. 

Ladybug lifted her chin and shrugged. “If you’re suggesting that I’m thinking something improper, you’re completely wrong. I’m a gentlewoman.”

“Uh huh,” Chat Noir deadpanned. “The same gentlewoman that  _ didn’t _ curse out a tourist for taking pictures of her chest the other day?”

“Shut up,” Ladybug snorted. “He deserved it.”

“Cheers to that.” They both held up their squares of fudge and tapped them in a toast before finishing them off in one bite. “Speaking of men,” Chat Noir continued, “[Jean Dujardin](http://img.spokeo.com/public/900-600/jean_dujardin_2013_02_04.jpg).”

“Absolutely,” Ladybug nodded. “Hot. My best friend was telling me the other day that he was ‘too old’ and I looked at her like she was crazy.”

“Okay thank you because  _ my _ best friend also said he’s not hot. Which. Have you  _ seen _ him?”

“Ridiculously handsome.”

“ _ Supremely _ handsome! Bless my soul if I ever aged as gracefully as that.”

Ladybug reached up and stroked Chat’s bare chin. “You with scruff? That’d be hilarious.”

“Um. I could pull off scruff. I’m a very mature and upstanding cat.”

“Please, you’re totally baby faced, I’ll believe you can pull off facial hair when I see it.”

“Excuse me, but I’ll have you know I have exactly three hairs growing on my chin.” He moved in closer and tipped his head back so that she could see. “Look! Don’t they make me look manly and irresistible?”

Ladybug squinted. “I don’t see anything, so I guess that answers that question.” 

Chat Noir gasped and pressed a scandalized hand to his chest. “ _ Rude! _ ”

Ladybug held the box of fudge away from him, stuck her tongue out, and squealed when Chat Nor got up and started chasing her across the roof that they were just laying out on. “It’s not my fault you can’t handle the truth, Chat!”

“The betrayal!” he shouted after her, laughing when they jumped across a narrow alleyway onto the next apartment building. “I thought we were Bi Besties!”

Ladybug rolled her eyes as she scaled the slanted roof and sat on top of a windowsill. “Stop trying to make Bi Besties happen. It’s super corny.” 

Chat Noir laid out against the shingles of the roof right underneath where Ladybug was sitting, and stared up at her with a wicked grin. “Bi Besties is the perfect superhero name for us. It’s accurate, inclusive, and proclaims us as role models for the questioning youth. They look up to us, you know.”

“Look it’s fine as an inside joke, but how are adults supposed to take us seriously when you go on national television and present us as the Bi Besties?”

“You were  _ so _ into it.”

“I mean, yeah,” Ladybug grumbled. “Right up until I had news reporters coming up to me the other day asking me about my sexuality.” She cleared her throat and deepened her voice until she was mimicking a snooty, television reporter. “Mmm, so Ladybug, would you say that your bisexuality affects your superhero work?”

Chat Noir rolled onto his back and laughed boisterously. “What did that even  _ mean?  _ I saw it on the news after the fight and it was the most cringeworthy thing I’ve seen in my life.”

Ladybug pressed the back of her hand to her forehead. “Oh heavens! An akuma! I sure hope my simultaneous appreciation for men and women won’t get in the way of taking it down!”

Chat Noir clasped his hands together under his chin. “It’s simply too much, Ladybug. My brain can’t possibly think of a way out of this sticky situation. There are too many thoughts of men  _ and _ women swirling around in there, I can’t bring myself to concentrate!”

“Do you think straight people really think that?” Ladybug asked. 

“I’d have to ask a straight person.” Chat Noir opened his mouth and leaned his head back. “Fudge me!”

Ladybug plucked off a piece of fudge, aimed, and managed to land the piece directly in Chat’s mouth. He lifted both of his fists in victory and cheered into the sky while Ladybug chuckled and opened up their second box of fudge. “Next time we decide to bum around on a Sunday, I’m bringing macarons. You’ve been having too much chocolate lately. How are you going to fit into that cat suit of yours?”

“Don’t body shame me, Ladybug, I’m a growing boy. I need sugar. By the way, it’s your turn.”

She searched the sky for another celebrity name. “Ah, [Gaspard Ulliel](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d3/Gaspard_Ulliel_Lumi%C3%A8res_2015.jpg).” 

Chat Noir waited for her to pass him a full square of fudge before he answered. “Hot. He looks like he’d treat me right.”

Ladybug wrinkled her nose. “Not. Sorry.”

“What?”

“He has squinty eyes!”

“The squinty eyes of an angel!”

“Statement stands.”

“Whatever,” he grumbled. “What about [Louane](http://i.f1g.fr/media/ext/1900x1900/madame.lefigaro.fr/sites/default/files/img/2015/11/louane.jpg)? The singer.”

“Hot,” Ladybug declared. “She’s such a cutie pie. Absolute sweetheart.”

“I’m gonna have to go with Not on this one. She’s cute, but it’s like she’s….too cute? Too nice?”

“And that’s a bad thing?”

“I like woman who would be happy to step on my face or have the power to murder me.”

“Oh my God,” Ladybug snickered. “Is someone like [Nolwenn Leroy](http://ilarge.lisimg.com/image/11413307/950full-nolwenn-leroy.jpg) up your alley?”

“A thousand times yes,” Chat Noir said enthusiastically. “I’d happily let her murder me.”

“Same,” Ladybug giggled. “You know, the more we play this, the more I’m getting a sense of your type. [Omar Sy](https://pmcvariety.files.wordpress.com/2014/11/omar-sy.jpg?w=670&h=377&crop=1) seems your type.”

“An impossibly attractive man with a beautiful smile? Hell yes. Dream husband, to be honest.”

Ladybug tapped a finger to her chin. “I’m gonna say….no on [Baptiste Giabiconi](http://ethnicelebs.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Baptiste-Giabiconi.jpg).”

“Right again,” Chat Noir nodded. “I dunno, too intense for my tastes. I’d probably date him once just to say I did because, hello, amazing, rich, and popular model. But I need a man who’s gonna go the distance.” 

“So a kindhearted but ridiculously attractive model that’s not too sweet but not too intense?” Ladybug asked. 

“Oh for sure. Especially if they were around my age? That’d be great.”

Ladybug wracked her brain for another celebrity that would fit Chat Noir’s specifications, but in an almost uncanny twist of fate, her eyes happened to land on a huge billboard poster about five or so rooftops away featuring Adrien Agreste and Gabriel’s new Teen Fall Fashion line. As often as they played these celebrity Hot or Not games whenever they had downtime, Ladybug never bothered to bring up Adrien Agreste. It just seemed weird to bring someone into those kinds of games that she had such a huge crush on in real life and who also happened to be such a close friend of hers, so she never bothered. 

But it was just a silly little game, and his billboard poster was  _ right there _ being so completely obvious. Plus, if she had to be honest, Adrien Agreste seemed exactly like Chat Noir’s type. So she tapped Chat Noir on the shoulder with her foot and pointed at the billboard. “Alright. How about Adrien Agreste?”

Chat Noir sat up abruptly and stared at Ladybug over his shoulder. “Say what now?”

“Adrien Agreste,” Ladybug replied simply, turning his head toward the poster with her foot. “The Gabriel model. Gabriel Agreste’s son. He’s been on the cover of I don’t know how many teen magazines. Have you not heard of him?”

“N-No, I have!” Chat Noir stuttered. “Uh, yeah I uh….have a friend who knows a lot about him.”

“Alright, let’s hear it,” Ladybug encouraged. “Hot or Not? He totally seems your type.” 

Chat Noir opened his mouth, closed it, and winced. “Eeehhhh, I dunno. T-That’s kind of a….a hard question.”

“Really?” she asked in confusion. “Why?”

He crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. “I just, you know, it’s a little weird. Um, because you see my friend. See she talks about him  _ a lot _ . So it’s just. I hear so much about him? And it’s kind of awkward. I guess. Sort of. Maybe.”

“Awkward….”

“Yeah. A little….i-inappropriate, if you will.”

Ladybug lifted a brow. “Chat, we literally had a twenty minute conversation yesterday about our dream weddings with [Emmanuel Macron](https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/834424630630817795/TfyS4uXb.jpg) and he’s our new President. How is Adrien Agreste more awkward and inappropriate than that?”

“It just is!” Chat Noir defended lamely. “I-I dunno, sometimes you just, y-you just don’t have opinions on things.”

Ladybug crossed her leg and cradled her chin in her hand. “This is so bizarre,” she breathed out in awe. “I thought for sure we’d feel the same about him.”

Chat Noir turned his entire body around, his eyes looking a little desperate and frantic. “F-Feel the same?” He cleared his throat and fiddled with the part in his bangs. “How, uh, how do you feel about him?”

“Totally Hot,” Ladybug said decisively. “Plus, I heard he’s around our age, and he lives right here in Paris. So he’s totally within my league.”

Chat Noir inhaled sharply and started choking on his spit, banging on his chest to clear his lungs. “Wait,” he croaked out. “Y-Y-You think he’s hot!? Like  _ hot _ hot?”

“Yeah?” Ladybug frowned. “What’s up with you? I’m surprised you don’t have an opinion of him.” 

“I didn’t know  _ you _ did!”

Ladybug shrugged. “Well, he never came up. But yeah he’s….absolutely charming. So handsome. A beautiful smile. Talented. And he seems like just the sweetest person in the whole world. Remember the akuma Jackady? When he was targeting Gabriel Agreste? I got to spend some time with Adrien amidst all the chaos and he was a complete delight. He seemed a little nervous to talk to me but I thought it was really adorable. I don’t mean to gush, but he just seems like a really special person. Really humble and down to earth for someone who’s so famous.”

She’d accidentally been staring at his billboard poster when she said all that, and she had to shake her head and sober herself up a little bit to not make her crush on him too obvious. But when she looked down at Chat, she found him staring up at her with a flabbergasted look on his face, a flush spreading all the way from his cheeks under his mask to the very tips of his ears. He bit down on his bottom lip and swallowed, tail swishing nervously behind him. 

“Are you okay?” she asked him worriedly. 

Chat Noir shook his head and covered his cheeks with one hand. “Yeah,” he spoke through his fingers. “I’m. No, I’m fine. Just, um. You must….really like him.”

Ladybug set aside the box of sweets and stepped down from her perch on the windowsill, settling down on the rooftop right in front of Chat. “You’re blushing.”

“A-Am I?” he said, his voice sounding oddly high-pitched. “I hadn’t noticed.”

Ladybug squinted her eyes suspiciously. “This is so weird, I’ve never seen you this flustered over another person before. Do you have a crush on him?”

“No, no way, definitely not!” Chat Noir quickly insisted. “I-It’s just, you know….kinda like….rating your best bud or something.”

“You’re best friends with him?”

“No!”

“So….you know him?”

“I mean…. _ know _ is such a strong word, don’t you think?”

Ladybug smirked. “I know you’re trying to divert attention away from this, but now I’m starting to think you’ve got some really juicy reason for not wanting to tell me whether you think he’s attractive.”

Chat Noir floundered around wordlessly for a moment before shutting his mouth, lifting both of his hands, and walking away from Ladybug towards the other end of the roof. “Nope. Not doing this. Nu uh.”

“Oh come on!” Ladybug giggled. “You can tell me! Do you know him from somewhere? Do you have this super big embarrassing crush on him and you don’t want me to know?”

“Why are you so fascinated by this?” Chat Noir asked. “It’s not that big a deal, is it?”

“Adrien Agreste is objectively gorgeous, and the fact that you’re reluctant to admit that is  _ super _ fascinating.” She pouted her lips and bounced on her toes. “ _ Please? _ It’s Sunday and we have nothing to do, you’re telling me you can’t dish out some gossip? You love gossip!”

“I’ve got nothing gossip worthy on him, honest!” Chat Noir swore. “I just….feel like there’s a line when it comes to these sorts of games, you know?”

Ladybug snorted. “Oh, since when are you such a party pooper? The only lines in this game are family members and ourselves, and you don’t fall into any of those categories anyway — ”

“Hey! Look at that! It’s a full moon!” Chat Noir interrupted, pointing at the sky almost desperately. “Isn’t that amazing? A full moon! Hey, let’s talk about the moon for a bit, huh? Won’t that be fun, like. Just. Talking about the moon and it’s….fullness?”

She wanted to say that Chat Noir had almost as big a crush on Adrien as Ladybug did, but in all honesty, she had no idea why he was being so secretive and acting so awkward. That being said, it seemed like a delightfully rare occurrence and she was never one for missing out on an opportunity to tease her partner, especially when he was turning this red over it. 

Ladybug clasped her hands behind her back. “Hey Chat?”

He flinched when he heard her voice and stopped his pacing. “Uh. Yes Ladybug?”

“If you were related to a successful, world-renowned fashion designer who lives right here in Paris, you’d tell me, right?”

Chat Noir covered his ears with his hands. “You know I can’t do that Ladybug, it’s against our code!”

“There’s probably a whole dynasty of Agrestes, I won’t be able to tell who you are if you just admit you’re a part of it,” Ladybug laughed. “It makes so much sense! You already have the blond hair and those high cheekbones. I bet you get invited to all the Fashion Week parties and you never even told me. The nerve.”

“Wait, cheekbones, you think I have their cheekbones?” Chat Noir asked. “Is it that obvious?”

“Oh  _ totally _ ,” Ladybug joked. “If anything, you and Adrien Agreste have the most startling similarity out of that whole family. I bet that’s why you’re too embarrassed to admit he’s attractive. The family resemblance is just too huge.”

“ _ Really!? _ ” Chat Noir exclaimed worriedly. “I-I mean, we’re not  _ that _ alike. Our….our hair is  _ so  _ different Ladybug, like,  _ wow _ , totally out of this world different it’s crazy. I think you’re being a little overdramatic.” 

Ladybug got closer to him so that she could grab his chin and turn his face left and right. “Nah, you two could be twins for sure. I mean we might as well plant your face on that billboard. It wouldn’t look any different.” She gave a dramatic gasp. “Oh my god, that’s it! You must be his twin.”

“Ladybug you’re being  _ ridiculous  _ that’s just. Crazy talk! You know that, right?”

She covered her mouth with one hand. “No! I’ve got it! It all makes sense! You  _ must _ be Adrien Agreste!”

Chat Noir shook his head and stared at Ladybug in abject horror. “Wait,  _ what!? _ ”

“It’s the only logical explanation, I mean why would anyone rate themselves, right?” Ladybug smirked. “To think that this entire time you’ve been this sweet, darling model by day and a sarcastic goofball by night. What a transformation. Really. Bravo.”

Chat Noir’s hands flew up to his hair and started yanking on it by the roots, and watching him get so flustered was probably the funniest thing Ladybug had seen all week. She chortled into her hand while she watched him stare back and forth between her and the billboard photo as if he were actually trying to convince himself that her ridiculous joke may actually be real. Such a drama queen. But then, Chat Noir completely surprised her when he dragged his hands down his cheeks and whined, “But how did you even figure it out?”

Ladybug sobered up and blinked. “Wait, what?”

Chat Noir’s jaw snapped shut and his eyes widened. “....nothing,” he squeaked. 

“Wait a minute, figure what out?”

“Nothing! I said nothing!”

Ladybug felt her jaw dropping and couldn’t stop her brain from putting together the pieces. “Wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait, y-you’re not….are you actually….oh my God, no  _ way!” _

“You were the one making it sound like you knew!” he defended. “You just said it!”

“I was kidding!” Ladybug screamed. “I thought we were just messing around, I didn’t think you actually thought I was serious!”

“I thought you knew and you were just trying to tease the answer out of me!”

“I wouldn’t joke about something like this if I actually knew, obviously I was kidding around!”

“Well I guess I’m just bad at picking up signals then!”

Ladybug held up both of her hands. “Stop, stop,” she begged. “Hold on. Hooold on. You’re telling me….you’re telling me that you’re Adrien Agreste?”

Chat Noir shrugged helplessly, trying to come up with a decent response to the question, but he merely let his shoulders drop and sighed, accepting the inevitable. “I….well….y-yeah. Yeah. I’m. I’m Adrien Agreste. There. Secret’s out.”

Ladybug stayed stunned for a few seconds, promptly turned around, and pressed her fingers against her temples. “Holy crap,” she muttered. “Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap.”

Chat Noir winced. “Not that I ever anticipated this would ever happen, but as far as reactions go, you’re having a pretty bad one by the looks of it.”

Ladybug paused and bit her lip. He was right. For Marinette, this was positively mind blowing. Her crush and the boy she sat behind in class was actually Chat Noir and that by itself was making her brain do cartwheels trying to wrap her head around such a reality. But for Ladybug, it shouldn’t be any more shocking than realizing a model is actually her crime fighting partner. Being too dramatic about this ran the risk of revealing more about who  _ her _ secret identity was and the fewer identity mishaps they could have tonight, the better. She was just going to….compartmentalize this and deal with it later. Much later. With her door locked. Screaming into her pillow. Tearing down all her Adrien posters. 

“I-I guess, I’m just,” she hesitated, turning around and trying to force her brain to picture Chat Noir doing chemistry homework in study hall or Adrien telling puns while dangling precariously from the top of the Notre Dame. “A little embarrassed? I kinda gushed over you just now so it’s a little weird. It’s not because I’m disappointed or angry or anything. Surprised, for sure. But I guess mistakes happen. We were going to find out sooner or later. Occupational hazard.” 

That seemed to placate his anxieties, and he blew out the anxious breath he was holding. “Well, that’s a relief. I’d prefer embarrassed over angry.”

“I’m not angry,” she assured him. “I probably shouldn’t have teased you so hard like that. That would’ve confused me too. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, I should’ve known better than to assume. It was mostly my fault.” He scratched the back of his head and smiled awkwardly. “Gosh, this is weird not having this secret hanging over my head anymore.”

“It is a little weird,” Ladybug agreed with a smile. “But, I think we should be okay. I’m the only one who knows. And as long as we’re careful and don’t let anyone else in on the secret, everything should be totally fine.”

“Good point,” Chat Noir agreed. “As long as this doesn’t change anything, we should be fine, right?”

Ladybug bit the inside of her cheek, trying to imagine how she was going to manage keeping her cool in front of Adrien on Monday now that she was hanging onto such a huge secret. “R-Right!” she replied quickly. “We’re totally fine.”

Chat Noir smiled in relief, but then suddenly widened his eyes in realization. “Wait a minute,” he smirked. “You’re so right….”

“Right about what?”

“You  _ were  _ totally gushing over me a minute ago.”

Ladybug scowled and held up a finger. “Chat….Adrien….or, both of you just…. _ don’t _ .”

“Oh,  _ I’m _ sorry,” Chat Noir laughed. “Is teasing only okay when you’re the one doing it? I’m suddenly feeling up to continuing our little game but, oh, could you remind me what your opinions of Adrien Agreste are?”

“Oh my God, shut  _ up!” _

Chat Noir started counting off his fingers. “Let’s see if I can remember them all. Gorgeous. Sweet. Delightful. Charming. Handsome. Did I forget any?”

Ladybug covered her face with her hands. “Stooooop.”

“To think!” Chat Noir snickered. “All this time you’ve been telling me how much I wasn’t your type, and I’ve been your  _ exact _ type this entire time!”

“You’re so infuriating leave me alone!”

“We should go on a date!”

Ladybug frowned, walked back over to where she left their sweets, and stomped away from him. “I’m leaving!”

“Noooo, come on! It’ll be nice! Like a celebrity date! It’ll be a lot of fun. You know, because I’m an absolute delight.”

“You’re never going to let this go, are you?”

“This is the perfect way to lighten up the mood, my Lady,” Chat Noir snickered. “Of course I’m not letting this go.”

“Leaving!!!”

“You can’t leave. I thought we were Bi Besties!”

“That’s never catching on Chat. Don’t even try it right now.” 


End file.
